


Take Off Your Coat (Don't You Know You Can't Win?)

by jenna_thorn



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Supernatural
Genre: Crossover, Gen, To Be Jossed, written pre-series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-21
Updated: 2013-05-21
Packaged: 2017-12-12 13:49:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/812268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenna_thorn/pseuds/jenna_thorn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean pulled past the warehouse and into the far side of an parking lot empty save for a sweet ride, an early 60’s ‘vette in candy apple red.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take Off Your Coat (Don't You Know You Can't Win?)

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Damn Yankee's - Whatever Lola Wants.

Dean pulled past the warehouse and into the far side of an parking lot empty except for a sweet vintage ride, an early 60’s ‘vette in candy apple red. He whistled as he pulled in a space over. “Lookit that, Sam, for once, we’re not the classiest chassis in the lot.” Dean closed the door and turned to see a nondescript man in an immediately forgettable suit walking with calm purpose toward them. He raised his voice to call across the parking lot, “Agent Coulson, right? Of the Homeland BoogeyMan Department.”

“Mr. Winchester.”

Dean slapped the back of his hand against Sam’s chest. “No, it’s cool, Sam, I know him. Met him with Dad.” He turned on the charm. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“I believe we had a discussion about the next time we met.”

“Oh yeah,” Dean laughed. “Dick measuring.”

“Not the conversation I meant.”

A red dot flashed onto Dean’s shirt and he raised his hands and slowed, swiveling only his head to trace the line up to the top of the warehouse. Coulson raised one hand to his ear as he said, “Stop that right now.” The red light blinked out. “My apologies. I’m breaking in a new sniper.”

“I can break him for you.”

“That won’t be necessary, but I appreciate the offer.”

“We here for the same reason?”

“Usually, although I believe this is our jurisdiction, and not yours. Nothing more otherworldly here than chemistry and forced genetic mutation.”

Sam leaned in to mutter, “No, Dean, the article said chupacabra ….”

“This is Minnesota, Mr. Winchester. Chupacabra are Southwestern. They’ve not yet migrated this far north. Something about the weather, I suspect. These are lab animals -- mutilated, but not mythical.”

“Well, we’ll leave them to you and the other fine agents of the SPCA. C’mon Sam.”

\--::--

“So, boss, who’s the asshole?”

“You, Mr. Barton.”

“I mean the asshole in the leather jack--,” he glanced down and said, “okay, right, the _other_ asshole in the leather jacket.”

“That would be Fury.”

Barton laughed. “I’ll tell him you said that. Fine. The civilian with the sidekick.”

“Not your problem.”

“I thought SHIELD didn’t do the petty jurisdictional shit, Coulson.”

“The world has grown larger than we can imagine, Barton. You knew that when you signed on.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Hello, Gorgeous](https://archiveofourown.org/works/815427) by [supergreak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/supergreak/pseuds/supergreak)




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